


un-fucking-forgettable

by mckinleysbitch (orphan_account)



Category: Stranger Things (TV 2016)
Genre: Alternate Universe, FTM, M/M, Trans Male Character, billy is hot and trans, high school reunion trope, no upside down, steve is hot and has a big dick
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-05
Updated: 2020-01-19
Packaged: 2021-02-27 14:02:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 9,142
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22128397
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/mckinleysbitch
Summary: Billy didn’t know why he was here.
Relationships: Billy Hargrove/Steve Harrington, Harringrove - Relationship, Steve Harrington/Billy Hargrove, Tommy hill/carol (mentioned)
Comments: 21
Kudos: 363





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is absolute shite that I wrote high off my ass last night but I am returning to the platform exclusively to post trans billy Hargrove sorry!
> 
> Will probably edit/rewrite later but for now suck this trans clit boys!
> 
> No chasers allowed!!!

Billy didn’t know why he was here.

That’s not true. He did know. It’d taken a lot of poking and prodding, fuckin’ nagging on Max’s part, but somehow she’s convinced him that setting foot anywhere near this town again was a good idea. His shrink had agreed. Closure or some shit, whatever. He didn’t want to be here, certainly didn’t want to be walking back through the doors of Hawkins fuckin’ high, didn’t want to face all those people. 

He’d left this place far behind him. Worked his ass off, gotten the hell out of there, moved to Chicago as soon as he had enough money. It wasn’t LA, he didn’t have the sunshine 12 months a year, but big city meant that no one actually gave a shit about you, so he could do what he wanted. 

This was fucking stupid.

None of these people were gonna /recognize/ him anyway. He’d been a different person here, passed as a butch dyke, basketball bitch, could make the girls swoon with just a /look/ and beat the shit out of anyone who crossed him. They weren’t his proudest years, but thank god for that. Billy would probably die if he’d peaked in high school.

Just walking through the doors was enough to make him tense, ripping the first name off the sticker he was given, hoping the neatly written HARGROVE would be enough as he made a beeline for the open bar, the only fuckin’ reparations for living in this place for so long. He mingled easily, despite himself. Had always been good at that, and people around here seemed to give less of a shit about his situation than he’d been expecting. Tommy just slapped him on the shoulder and told him he looked good, Carol still made eyes at him, despite the ring on her finger. Good to know he still had his looks going for him, at least. 

It wasn’t until a few drinks in that his eyes fell on someone he might actually want to see. Steve fuckin’ Harrington, king of Hawkins High, hottest shit in smalltown Indiana. Still true, by the looks of it.

They’d been… rivals? That sounded so fuckin’ high school. Whatever it’d been, Billy’d been hot for the guy for two straight years, not that he’d ever admitted it. He’d had a reputation to uphold, and fucking the prom king had not been in that equation. 

Not that they hadn’t come close once or twice, sharing a cigarette at a party, looking at each other a little too long. But Billy’d always pulled back, always just teased a little and gone back inside, driven home and fuckin’ dreamed about it. But he hadn’t been who he wanted to be, and he wasn’t about to let a guy fuck him thinking he was who he was. 

Now though… 

Steve caught his gaze, and Billy watched him try and fail to place who he was looking at. Idiot. He kept talking to whoever he’d been talking to, trying to ignore it. Maybe ten years ago he coulda done something, but Steve Harrington was straight, and Billy didn’t exactly fit the bill anymore. 

But he was still looking. Five minutes later, ten minutes, and Billy couldn’t fuckin’ take it. He politely excused himself, walking across the room to where Steve was standing like a deer in headlights. 

“You look like you’re thinkin’ too hard, pretty boy” He raised an eyebrow, used an old nickname to try and give the guy a hint, held out his free hand. “Billy Hargrove.” 

And finally, finally, recognition played across Steve’s face, eyebrows going up as he shook, not even trying to hide the way he looked him over, laughing low like he couldn’t believe he hadn’t put it together already. He’d always had such an ease about him that Billy was never sure if he was jealous of or attracted to. Probably both. Right now, it just kinda made his stomach flip, like he was right back where he was ten years ago, blushing like a goddamn teenage girl with one look from King Steve Harrington. 

Maybe he was.

He needed another drink.

“Wow, okay, thank you. I knew I couldn’t have forgotten a face like that.” and you know what? Fuck him for being so fucking charming. Billy almost wished he was an asshole about it, just so he could stay convinced that everyone here was just as bad as he remembered. But Steve was smiling at him, and fuck him, Billy was smiling right back, rolling his eyes a little as he pulled his hand back. 

He looked good, because of course he did, because when hadn’t he? But he really looked good, more grown up, sporting glasses and tamer hair, clearly not wearing polos that mommy laid out for him anymore. Billy wished he didn’t, wished he’d gotten schlubby and old and fat, just so he could save himself the humiliation of remembering just how badly he’d wanted. But luck wasn’t on his side, clearly. 

He finished what was left of his drink.

“Charming as ever, huh Harrington?” He could feel it bubbling back up, that cocky attitude, felt the smirk curl across his lips, tried not to get to smug about the way it made Steve run his tongue over his own. 

Steve laughed, and Billy kinda wanted to cry. 

“Sure hope so,” he was swirling his drink absently, smiling at him, like Billy had never been anything different than he was now, “You haven’t really changed much either, have you?” 

“Guess not.” It was so easy, falling back into it, this weird back and forth. If Billy’d been good at getting a rise out of him, Steve was always better at doing the opposite, getting under his skin and making him soft. God. “Look at you though, huh? What’s with the new look?” Not that he was complaining. He liked it. He looked so… comforting, warm. Really just looked like his insides finally made it to the outside, too.

Steve rolled his eyes and Billy grinned.

“Don’t get me wrong, it looks good. Very sexy librarian.”

And there it was, the little tinge of pink he’d always been chasing, the way Steve smiled and looked down into his cup like he thought that would hide it. God he was still such a fuckin’ sucker. 

“I’m a teacher now, gotta look the part.” And of course he was, as soon as he said it, it made perfect sense. He’d always been leading that pack of nerds around like a mother hen. “What about you? Where’d you go when you ran off?”

He asked like he was actually interested, like he wanted to know, not like he was wondering what the hell a tranny like him did for cash. Not like the rest of these dickheads. 

“I’m in Chicago, didn’t make it very far,” he knew Steve knew he’d wanted to get home, back to the coast. It’d been all he could talk about back then, but life was a little more complicated than that. “I own a bar, not quite as wholesome as teaching.” Steve snorted a laugh. 

“Wouldn’t expect wholesome from you.” It almost sounded like an insult, but the way he was lookin’ at him, like he was proud, told him otherwise. 

When he met Steve’s eye, he could feel the air change, but he kinda didn’t want to acknowledge it. Glanced back towards the bar, towards the door, like maybe he could just bolt before he let himself get in too deep. 

“You still allowed to go for a smoke, teach?” His fingers were itching for something to do, feet itching to get the hell out of this gym. 

Steve turned, like he was looking for someone, held a hand up like he was signaling not to worry if he couldn’t be found. Billy followed his gaze, he didn’t mean to get such a sour taste in his mouth when he saw a girl wave back, some girl he vaguely recognized. He knew it was selfish, and stupid to think Steve wasn’t… that he wouldn’t have someone. But then he was back, smiling again, shrugging and finishing off whatever was left in his cup. 

“Yeah, sure.” 

“That your girlfriend?” He shouldn’t ask. It felt too accusatory coming out of his mouth. It wasn’t his fucking business. Steve just laughed, rolled his eyes, glanced back towards her again.

“No, just my ride.” He bumped Billy’s shoulder a little as he took a step towards the exit, walked a few steps backwards as he stood stuck in place, feeling a little stupid. “You coming? I gotta bum one off you.” 

—

It was cold outside, it was always fuckin’ cold in this town, but he didn’t mind it. Chicago got him used to this shit, even if he still resented it every year. 

If he noticed the way Steve shuffled a little closer as he got out his cigarettes, he didn’t comment on it. Lit his own between his teeth before holding the lighter out, tried not to seem surprised when he just leaned in a little instead of taking it for himself. 

“So,” it was Steve who broke the silence first, looking at him sideways, their backs against the brick, “A bar, huh?” 

Billy snorted, smiled down at his feet. “Yeah, I’d say come by if you’re ever in town, but…” he took a drag, shrugged a little, “not sure it’d be your scene, pretty boy.” He knew he was rolling his eyes without looking over, could hear Steve huff a little.

“You might be surprised.” And like, okay, “it’s been a long time since you’ve seen me.”

“Oh yeah?” 

“Yeah.”

They looked at each other for a second like that, like a challenge hung between them, before Billy breathed a laugh, broke the moment, shook his head and looked back out towards the parking lot.

“You had me all fucked up in high school, you know that?” He looked over again, ashed his cigarette off to the side, “I thought I was gay, thought that’s why I wanted to look like a boy so bad. But you were… I liked you. And I couldn’t fuckin’ figure out what that meant.”

Steve looked like he didn’t really know what to say, and Billy almost wished he hadn’t said anything, but his big fuckin’ mouth always did the talking before his brain could do the thinking. 

“You ever figure it out?” 

He had to laugh, and Steve laughed with him, maybe unsure of why. 

“Yeah, pretty boy. Think it meant I liked you, simple as that.” He shrugged, chewed the inside of his lip a little, tore his eyes away again, “took me longer than I’d like to admit to get that.” 

The silence between them was deafening, suffocating, Billy wanted to walk to his car and never look back at this fucking place. He hated to put it all out there like that, even now. Working on it, sure, but still couldn’t fuckin’ stand the look of pity he sometimes got when he spilled his guts. 

“Billy.” 

When he looked back, Steve was closer. He wasn’t sure how he didn’t notice him move, but there he was, looking down at him like that, with those soft brown eyes. 

“Yeah?” It almost caught in his throat, and he dropped his cigarette, didn’t really watch to see where it landed, couldn’t tear his eyes away. 

“You figured it out, though, right?” Billy watched his eyes flick down, and he wished for a second that he hadn’t let himself do this, come out here with Steve alone, because he knew there was no coming back from this one, there was no more hating this town.

“I… yeah.” 

“Okay.”

He should’ve been expecting it when Steve kissed him, but it still took him a second, just a moment of surprise before he melted into it, wrapped an arm around his shoulders and sighed against his mouth. God his fucking mouth. He was so goddamn gentle, because of course he was, kissing Billy like they had all the time in the world, and for a second maybe he let himself believe they did. Like he wasn’t going home in two days, or like Steve was coming with him.

He was probably never going to get over this stupid high school crush, not after this, not now that he experienced it live and in technicolor. Fuck. 

It was an eternity before they disconnected, or felt like it anyway. He probably coulda kept doing that forever, probably could’ve died doing that, kinda wished he would. 

“Jesus, king Steve is fuckin’ right,” He leaned his head back against the wall, grateful for the cool brick against his skin. Steve was all pink, smilin’ down at him like he hadn’t just ruined Billy’s fuckin’ life. 

“Where you staying?” He looked smug asking it, Billy huffed a laugh.

“What kinda guy you think I am, Harrington?” Steve just smiled dumb back at him, shrugged like he knew where this was goin’ already. Not that he was wrong. “Shitty motel by the highway.” 

“Stay with me instead.” He leaned in again, like a kiss would convince him, and he was fuckin’ right about that. God. He was such a fuckin’ sucker.

“Yeah, alright.”

—

“Your folks still live here?”

He remembered the Harrington house, more like fuckin’ mansion, went to enough parties under this roof for it to stick, but he kinda hadn’t expected it to still be around, for some reason. Like this town just disappeared off the map as soon as he left.

“Yeah, when they’re in the country, anyway.” He was flicking lights on as they went along, glancing back at Billy with a smile, “But I know where they hide a key so, free place to stay when I come through town.” 

Billy followed him up the stairs, dropped his bag once they got in the bedroom, unable to keep himself from snooping around a little. 

“You were such a fuckin’ prep, are you wearing two polos?” He had pictures pinned up above his desk, it looked like no one had touched anything since high school. He was glad there were none of him, in the background of a party shot or anything. Mood killer. “Can’t believe I thought you were hot in boat shoes.” He heard Steve snort behind him, smiled when he felt an arm snake around his waist. 

“Oh please, don’t act so high and mighty. You wore snapbacks.” Billy turned, let himself be crowded against the desk, laughed against his lips when he leaned in. 

“Yeah and I looked fuckin’ hot, the whole town agreed,” he felt all fucking warm inside, coiling in his belly as Steve kissed him slow, pushed his fingers up into that hair he’d always wanted to touch. The reunion was probably still going on, Billy hoped Steve’s ride wasn’t looking around for him, but also fuck em’. Fuck that place. Right here was good, he could stay right here forever. 

He ended up sitting on the desk, a leg wrapped around Steve’s waist, just making out like they were teenagers who just discovered that was something they could do. Steve was a good kisser, really he was, and his hands wandered, like he couldn’t stop himself from touching. Maybe he couldn’t. Fuck. Billy breathed in sharp through his nose when he brushed a thumb across his inner thigh, almost embarrassed at how eager he was, almost, and suddenly it was a lot heavier. Steve was practically leaning over the desk, stroking up his legs, pushing up under his shirt, and fuck fuck fuck he was never gonna get this out of his head.

Billy had to pull back then, propped up on his elbows and holding in the laugh that threatened to bubble up over just how fucked they both were, “As hot as this is, pretty boy, that bed of yours looks soft as hell.” 

Steve didn’t need to be told twice. 

Before he could really register it, he was being lifted, carried over to the bed, dropped down against the pillows like Steve couldn’t even take an extra second, like he couldn’t fucking wait.

Maybe he couldn’t. 

Billy definitely couldn’t. 

It’d been… admittedly kind of a while. Not that he couldn’t get it if he wanted it, but he’d been busy, and his last boyfriend had left him kinda wary of it all, of men who said they wanted him until they got his pants down. He’d always acted like it was such a chore, Billy got fed up. 

Steve looked at him like he was hungry for it. 

He knew the rumors, had heard plenty about king Steve and his magic tongue around the halls of Hawkins High, that he was a giver, he wondered if that was still true. 

It didn’t take long to find out. 

Steve had unbuttoned his shirt and tossed it aside, pressed open mouth kisses to his neck, his chest, his scars, like Billy was something to be worshipped. He looked up at him with those big brown eyes, laving his tongue over his naval, nimble fingers popping open his jeans, barely sitting back for long enough for Billy to shimmy out of them. 

He sucked a mark into his inner thigh, teased at the waistline of his underwear, put his face between his legs and fucking breathed in, which like, gross, but also so fucking hot. He felt like he was gonna explode. 

When he finally, finally got his mouth on him, peeled off his boxer briefs and practically moaned against him, Billy was pretty sure he short circuited. Because he was good, god he was fucking good at that. He had him reduced to a whimpering mess in five minutes flat, fingers crooked inside him, sucking the goddamn life out of his clit. He came easy, groaning and tugging at that pretty hair, grinding against Steve’s tongue as he just fucking laid there, open mouthed, like he wanted Billy to use him to get off. Jesus. 

He came two more times like that, until he was fucking pushing his head away, overstimulated, oversensitive, positive he looked about as fucked out as anyone ever had. 

“Okay, okay, holy shit, you tryna kill me?” Steve just gave him a self satisfied grin as he climbed back up the bed, still mostly clothed, kissing his own fucking taste into Billy’s mouth. 

Gross.

He might be in love.

“You gotta fuck me already, pretty boy, I’ve already been waitin’ a decade.” 

Steve followed instructions. Billy liked that. If he wasn’t so desperate, maybe he’d see how far he could take it. 

But he totally was. And Steve’s dick was fucking big, and he hadn’t been fucked proper in like, months, so it could wait. 

He was so fucking careful, so deliberate with every movement, pushing into Billy like he was worried he was gonna hurt him, as if he could after that treatment, he wasn’t sure he’d ever been fucking wetter. And it was so good, once he was there, once he started moving a little. Billy couldn’t contain himself, moaning low with each push, grasping at his shoulders, his arms, anything, like if he didn’t hang on he might get too lost in it all. 

And fuck, he might, because Steve was not fucking gentle anymore, and his eyes were rolling back in his damn head, and he sort of wished he could just capture this moment in a bottle to show to anyone who ever didn’t know how to treat him because this was the new fucking standard. 

He wasn’t really sure how long it lasted, he knew he came at least twice before Steve was burying his face in his neck, though, breathing nonsense against his skin. He knew they’d be doing this again, he knew he wasn’t fucking leaving this house until he left on Monday morning. 

He knew he probably wasn’t letting that be the end of it either. 

“That was fucking…” he just laughed, and Steve laughed with him.

“Yeah.” 

They shared a cigarette as they lay there, naked over the blankets.

“where’d you say you live again?” Steve almost looked sheepish when he asked, sitting up to ash the cigarette into a glass on the nightstand.

“I didn’t.” 

He twisted around to look back at him, raising an eyebrow. 

“I live in Chicago.” 

“Fuck off, no you don’t.” But Steve was looking at him like he was earnest, and Billy kind of couldn’t believe it. 

“Logan square.” No way. No fucking way. There was no way he got this fucking lucky. 

“Don’t fuck with me Harrington.” How had he not known? How the fuck had this man been walking around without Billy noticing. Steve just smiled a little, shrugged like he hadn’t been keeping this fucking bombshell to himself. Billy wanted to kiss him. 

He did. Because he could. Fucking Chicago. 

He didn’t want to say it, hated himself for thinking it, but Hawkins really wasn’t so bad after all.


	2. This

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bro they fuckin

It’d been two weeks since he heard from Steve.

He was trying not to think about it too much. It’s not like either of them were obligated to keep this thing going, whatever it was. They’d had sex for basically 48 hours straight, and then Billy had driven away from that town again, just leaving his number and a promise of next time, but like… there didn’t  _ have  _ to be a next time. He didn’t  _ need  _ it. 

They’d texted back and forth a little, how are you’s and what was happening at work and whatever, but it wasn’t much. And again, it’d been two weeks since either of them had said anything at all.

Maybe he was riding the fantasy too far. Even though they were both here, both  _ clearly  _ attracted to each other, he didn’t really  _ know  _ Steve. They obviously lead very different lives, ran in very different crowds. Maybe it just wasn’t meant to be. 

He was almost ready to throw in the towel, just let that weekend be what it was and accept the closure in that. His friends told him to, his bartender Eric rolled his eyes as Billy opened and closed Steve’s contact in his phone, scrolled through his fucking Instagram like some lovesick teenager, but he was a sucker.  _ God  _ he was such a fucking sucker.

It was another week later that Steve walked into the bar on a Saturday night, and maybe Billy was also a fucking coward, because he  _ hid. _

“Is that him?” Eric was watching over the bar as Billy crouched behind it, pretending to be looking for something, “damn, I mean, I  _ get  _ it now.” 

It was busy, Steve showed up with friends, maybe he could just stay down here the rest of the night. Not that he  _ really  _ wanted to, he just… didn’t like to talk about shit. Didn’t want to have to ask what happened, especially because it was probably fucking  _ nothing.  _ They were both adults, they both had lives, he probably just got busy for a while. He probably didn’t think anything of it.

“Billy?”

_ Fuck.  _ Caught. 

He popped up with a smile, threw a towel over his shoulder like that’s what he’d been looking for, raised an eyebrow over the bar as Steve leaned forward against it. 

“Hey there, pretty boy.” Eric was giving him this  _ look  _ that he pointedly ignored, tried to just focus on the lopsided smile he was getting from the other, “you need somethin’ to drink?” Because like, he  _ was  _ at work, even if this wasn’t technically his job. That’s why Eric was here. He didn’t need to be making drinks. 

Steve laughed, looked over his shoulder at his friends, shrugged a little.

“They probably do, but uh,” his tongue darted out over his lips, Billy’s eye caught the movement, “I was kinda hoping I could talk to you?” There it was. Billy wanted a drink, or something, but as soon as he reached he felt his hand get slapped away, fixed with another look from Eric. 

“Uh, yeah. Yeah, sure. C’mon.” He nodded towards the back, made his way out from behind the bar and towards the office door, unlocking it while he waited for Steve to make his way through the crowd. 

It was too quiet once they were alone.

“Hi.” Steve was smiling, Billy couldn’t help but smile back.

“Hey.” What did he want, showing up here after radio silence? He watched him wander a little, look at the pictures on his desk - one with Max, another with friends, one, regrettably, with his ex boyfriend. He should really get rid of that. “What’re you doing here?” Because he wasn’t gonna give in, wasn’t about to just jump into his arms, even if he wanted to. He had some fucking pride. 

“Yeah, I’m sorry for being so…” he shrugged, turned around and leaned backwards on the desk, looked at him with those big fucking brown eyes. “I guess I got a little… I like you but I was worried maybe it was just… nostalgia, or something. I dunno. Maybe I was just spooked.” 

“Oh.” 

“But I’m annoying all my friends, can’t stop thinking about you, won’t stop talking about you.” He breathed this laugh, and Billy felt his shoulders relax a little. “I think we should, y’know, give it a shot. If you want.” Billy still couldn’t open his damn mouth, Steve shrugged again, looked  _ nervous _ , like he would ever say no. “I want to.” 

He swallowed thick, glanced back towards the door, tried not to smile. He wasn’t fucking  _ good  _ at this shit. 

“Okay.” 

When he looked back, Steve was fucking  _ grinning,  _ and he rolled his eyes, chewed the inside of his lip to keep from doing the same. 

“Don’t look at me like that. What’d you think, I’d say  _ no?”  _

“No. I dunno. I thought maybe I’d fucked it up.” He let himself smile then, breathed a laugh, walked over and wrapped his arms around Steve’s waist. “You were hiding from me.” 

“That obvious?” Billy didn’t give him a chance to answer, leaned in smiling against his lips. Maybe this would blow up in his face, maybe it was a mistake to date someone you went to high school with, maybe he kinda just wanted to be fucking  _ happy  _ for a little while.

He did have to run his bar, though.

Steve spent the rest of the night making eyes at him from his table with his friends, stuck around until closing, came and leaned against the bar as the last customer left them alone. Even Eric had gotten the hell out of there. Good riddance.

“You gonna invite me over?” His words slurred a little and Billy couldn’t help but laugh, looked him over as he finished putting glasses away.

“Seems like I oughtta, don’t wanna make you go home like this.” It was his own fault, got seduced by all of it, sent a lot of free drinks over to his table, “you’re lucky I live upstairs, pretty boy.” 

—

He helped Steve out of his clothes once they were in his apartment, let him lean down to kiss him a few times before shoving him into bed.

He was asleep before he even hit the damn pillow. 

Billy didn’t think he’d been this happy in a while, but he didn’t want to get ahead of himself. 

Falling asleep together was nice, though, Steve’s arm slung over his chest, his soft breathing in Billy’s ear. That feeling was back, the warmth coiling in his belly, the tightness in his chest. 

He really might be in fuckin’ trouble here. 

When he woke up, Steve wasn’t there, and for a moment he panicked, wondered if maybe he’d changed his mind. But then, he could  _ smell  _ breakfast cooking, and  _ god,  _ how fucking domestic. 

He was just wearing his tshirt from the night before and boxers, humming to himself as he cooked, smiled when Billy came up behind him and wrapped his arms around his waist, kissed his shoulder.

“Hey sleepyhead,” Billy huffed, rolled his eyes.

“It’s not even ten,” Steve shrugged, he counted the moles on his back, “smells good.” He got a hum in response.

“I made coffee.” And that was  _ beautiful _ , the only thing that could possibly pull him away from letting his hands wander, from distracting Steve from breakfast. 

“Thank god,” he moved to grab a mug, poured some for both of them, leaned against the counter as he sipped at it, watching the other. 

“What?” Steve was smiling bashful, like he didn’t think he should be looked at. Billy shrugged, smiling back.

“You’re just awful pretty, ‘specially when you’re cookin’ for me.” And he rolled his eyes, like he didn’t believe it, like it didn’t affect him, but Billy could see the blush spreading up his cheeks, across his chest. God he was fucking cute. 

He was so fucked.

They ate quietly, mostly because it was  _ good,  _ and how the hell was Steve Harrington hot and kind  _ and  _ a good cook? 

Billy grabbed him by the collar and kissed him before he could bother clearing their dishes, ate up the little laugh he got, pulled back out with a smirk threatening to make an appearance.

“What was that for?” There was amusement in Steve’s voice, and he just cocked an eyebrow, ran his tongue over his lips.

“Dunno. Wanted to.” And he wanted to do it again, so he did, and again, and Billy had him backed against the counter, and Steve fucking  _ whined  _ when he let his hand skirt a little too close to his cock, pushing up under his shirt. He felt a little smug at that, at the look on his face when he pulled back and grinned, dropped to his knees and took his boxers with him. 

Kinda wanted to record the noise he made when Billy ran his tongue up the length of his dick, for later, just for him. He could settle for making him do more of that, though. 

They hadn’t had a chance to do this last night, Billy’s fault, and he’d gotten himself worked up over it in the weeks they hadn’t seen each other. A vibrator could only keep him going so long, a vibrator didn’t  _ moan _ like Steve did, didn’t push fingers into his hair and breathe his name like it was a damn  _ prayer.  _

Not that Billy wasn’t practically  _ gagging  _ for it too, looking up through his lashes and swallowing him down in one go, almost amazed with himself for it. 

“ _ Jesus,”  _ Billy pulled back with a pop, grinning up at him.

“It’s Billy, baby.” And if he wasn’t distracted, he figured Steve would probably roll his eyes at that with a smile that told him he thought it was endearing. Now, though, he didn’t look like he could do much thinking at all, let alone reacting, other than a mumbled  _ please  _ and an extra tug on his hair. 

He didn’t last very long, he was slumping against the counter sooner than Billy expected, but he took that as a compliment, swallowing dutifully and nipping a little at his thigh, reveling in the way it made Steve squirm. 

Billy was hauled back up into another kiss, melted against his lips, laughed as Steve pulled away to run his hands over his face.

“I think you’re gonna kill me,” he tucked a curl behind Billy’s ear, wrapped an arm around to grab at his ass and pull him in closer. Billy snorted, tipped his head to the side so Steve could tuck into the crook of his neck, press his lips against his pulse.

“Only if you want me to, pretty boy.” 

“Mm, think maybe I do.” And like, yeah. He could definitely manage that. 

“You got any plans today?” He has both hands over Billy’s ass now, and he grinned, shook his head.

“Nah.” Thank god he didn’t, not until he had to open the bar, “this.” Steve smiled, kissed him again, like he couldn’t stand to not be connected somehow. 

Maybe he couldn’t.

“Good.”


	3. this time it's steve

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve Harrington is stupid in love. 

Steve Harrington is stupid in love. 

Not that he was surprised, he knew himself well enough to see this coming. Almost could say he saw it coming the moment he saw Billy, but maybe that was more wishful thinking than anything else. 

But, god help him, he was. He was totally in love. 

He never stopped thinking about Billy, always had him in the back of his mind, wondering when they could see each other next, hoping he would want to. He could be… a little hot and cold, but Steve took it in stride, didn’t ask if he could tell Billy didn’t want him to, knew now that sometimes he just needed a day or two to himself. 

But he loved him. God, it was crazy to keep thinking that. 

It was too early for this shit, he knew that, but he’d always come in a little too hot in relationships, it didn’t seem to be scaring Billy off, yet. A few months was still a long time. Longer than Steve’d been seeing anyone in… a while. Maybe more than a while. He was just so goddamn  _ happy,  _ he didn’t want to question it. Just… go with the flow, right?

His friends were fed up, kept asking  _ ‘when the hell are you two gonna be out of the honeymoon phase’  _ because they were tired of him having nothing to say other than Billy, Billy,  _ Billy.  _ He wasn’t sure they ever would.

It was all too mushy to think about, especially right now, sitting with a friend in the bar, getting a little lost in the way Billy arms looked. Steve  _ loves  _ watching him make drinks, can hardly tear his eyes away. 

“Steve, fuck’s sake,” He hears Robin laugh, and he looks back, a little sheepish. Because like,  _ yeah,  _ he’s definitely  _ dumb  _ when he’s feeling like this, definitely not the most attentive friend. 

“Sorry,” she just laughs, rolls her eyes, looks over in Billy’s direction. “I mean, I get it, he’s hot, but like, what’d he do? Put a spell on you?” Steve just kinda shrugs, can’t help but follow her lead and look back over too.

“You’ll make fun of me if I tell you.” She gives him this look like  _ i would never,  _ but it’s Steve’s turn to roll his eyes, “Oh come on Buckley, last time I told you I was in love you stopped at nothing to get me to tell her, look how well that turned out.” He cringed at the thought, the ex girlfriend to end all ex girlfriends, evidently. “I’m playing it cool.”

“Uh huh,  _ very  _ cool,” She snorted a little as she sipped her drink, “You’re wearing a cardigan in a gay bar, Steve. You’ve practically made yourself at home.” Steve looked down, tried not to look surprised at himself, because, like,  _ yeah,  _ kinda. He didn’t even really think about what he was wearing before he left, knew it wouldn’t really matter if he got his way. 

“I… yeah. I guess I have.” Was it bad that he wasn’t embarrassed? It sort of made him feel  _ warm,  _ couldn’t help but steal another glance Billy’s way, catching his eye with a smile, “It’s kinda nice, though, right? Like, I have a  _ boyfriend. _ ” It shouldn’t be as unbelievable as he felt like it was, clearly Robin was not impressed. 

“Yeah, Steve, you do.” She laughed, “Just tell him, throw caution to the wind baby. When was the last time that didn’t work out?”   
  
Steve rolled his eyes again, kind of didn’t want to admit how much he  _ liked  _ the idea, 

“Oh yeah, great advice from a drunk girl.” 

“Drunk girl advice is always good advice.” 

Maybe she was right.

\---

He woke up the next morning in Billy’s apartment, sun filtering through the windows, blinking himself back into reality. He hadn’t been that drunk, really, but it still took him a second to get back into his own head, remember where he was and how he got here. 

He padded into the kitchen feeling absolutely content, finding Billy already pouring two mugs of coffee, putting out a plate of toast, looking the way he did in the mornings. And like, maybe he could see himself doing this every day, waking up to this, mumbling a ‘hi’ as he nuzzled into Billy’s neck, smiled when he breathed a laugh.

“Hey pretty boy,” The tone of his voice, low and so  _ easy, _ turned his insides out, it made him feel so…  _ god,  _ he wasn’t even sure. He needed to get himself together. “You hungry?” 

“Mm, yeah.” He lets Billy push past him to put their coffee on the table, plops himself down in a chair and takes a piece of toast, smiling a little to himself.

“What?” Billy’s giving him a questioning look, Steve holds in a laugh. 

“Nothing. Just having a good morning.” He punctuates it by biting into the bread, loves the way Billy rolls his eyes, loves the way he can’t hold back a smile. 

They eat together, get dressed together, talk aimlessly about their weekend and their night and what they have to do for their weeks.

“I gotta meet with our liquor guy, but you’re welcome to stick around,” Billy’s looking through papers at the kitchen counter as he says it, Steve smiles, shrugs on his jacket. 

“Nah, it’s okay. I should go home and get some grading done anyway.” He leans across the surface, plants a kiss on Billy’s forehead, lets him grab his shirt and pull him in for a real one, laughs against his mouth. 

“Maybe I’ll see you later?” Steve shrugs, like the answer isn’t yes, opens the door without actually leaving.

“Yeah, maybe. Love you.” 

It’s out of his mouth before he can think about it.

_ Fuck. _

Billy just kinda gets this wide-eyed look, Steve’s heart drops into his stomach.

“Steve, baby-”   
  


“Nope! No, all good. I’ll see you.” And then he’s out the door, down the stairs, and in his car, mind going a mile a fucking minute, trying not to think about whatever Billy was about to say. He looked so…  _ sorry. _

_ Fuck. _

\--- 

“I’m never taking your advice again.” He’s sitting on his couch- or, laying on the couch, arm flung over his face, half-graded tests abandoned on his coffee table. He can feel Robin roll her eyes at him, doesn’t want to look over to see whatever look she has on her face. “This is your fault.”

“Shut up, drama queen. Nothing bad even happened.” Nothing bad, as if Billy not  _ saying anything  _ for two whole days wasn’t bad. “You’re overreacting.” 

“Am not.” 

“You’re a grown fucking man, Steve. Get it together.” And she’s  _ right,  _ he just doesn’t want to admit it, would rather stare at his last texts to Billy with big sad eyes and wait for that little typing bubble to pop up. 

<< Sorry for this morning, just kinda slipped out.

<< feel free to pretend it never happened.

_ Fuck. _

“He’s probably just busy, you did the same thing at the beginning, remember?” Which like,  _ yeah,  _ but no one had just said ‘ _ I love you _ ’. 

“Yeah.” Because he knew if he kept complaining she’d just keep berating him. At least if he agreed she’d feel too smug to argue about it anymore. 

“So just relax. Let’s watch TV. You wanna smoke?” Not much else to do on a Tuesday night anyway, certainly couldn’t go to Billy’s bar.

“Yeah, alright.” He put his phone down, tried not to look too puppy-dog sad, as Robin called it, was grateful for the joint she handed him a few minutes later. They hadn’t done much of this, just lying around together, since he and Billy started dating. Maybe he needed it to just… chill out a little bit. 

They definitely chilled out, whatever weed Robin had was  _ good,  _ he was fucking  _ high.  _ Not so high strung anymore, wasn’t even looking at his phone. A miracle.

And then there was a knock. 

“Did we order food?” Robin was looking at her phone like she was trying to remember, Steve shrugged and got up, looked through the peephole. 

“It’s Billy,” He said it lazy at first, like he hadn’t quite processed who he was actually seeing, “Oh shit. It’s Billy. I’m so high.” Robin laughed, he whipped around to glare at her, “ _ Your fault.”  _ She just kept laughing, Steve tried to steele himself and opened the door.

“Hi.” He could see Billy’s nose crinkle up, watched him laugh and look past him into the apartment.

“High is right, huh? You two having fun without me?” He looked… calm. Didn’t look mad. Didn’t look spooked. Robin laughed from inside, Steve felt like he wanted to melt into the ground. What did he even look like right now? He wasn’t sure he wanted to know.

“Uh,” He didn’t know what to say, didn’t know what he wanted to say, didn’t know what  _ Billy  _ came here to say. “Maybe. You wanna come in?” 

“If that’s okay.”   
  
“I… yeah. Sure.” He stepped to the side, reeling a little from him just  _ showing up _ like this after-

“I tried to text you but you didn’t answer, figured I’d just come by.” Steve glanced at his phone, still face down on the coffee table, cursed himself for not checking it. “Maybe it’s not… the best time, but I wanna talk, at some point. We can just hang out for now though.” 

“Okay.” 

“Okay.” Billy smiled, like kinda sad but not that sad, like maybe he was just disappointed at the timing and not at  _ everything.  _ It was enough to calm his nerves just a little. “You better give me some of that.” He flopped down on the couch, Steve found his place next to him, watched him take a joint from Robin and suck half of it down, put his arm around Steve’s shoulders. 

Maybe it was the weed, maybe it was just that Billy’d shown up here at all, but he wasn’t so… on edge anymore. It felt nice, just sitting together, like Billy didn’t care, like he hadn’t outed himself as an absolute cheeseball two days earlier.

They just… sat, watched bad TV until Robin went to bed, muttering something about sleep schedules on her way out of the room, and they were alone. And Steve was still a little high, maybe a little horny too, especially when he could feel Billy’s eyes on him. 

“Uh, so do you wanna-” 

“Nah, we can talk in the morning.” He cut him off so fast, Steve had to breathe a laugh, looked over at him with a lopsided smile, blinked once before he was closing the space between them, hauling Billy over onto his lap. 

It was lazy, which was  _ nice.  _ Billy was usually all fire and aggression, but he liked this, liked just barely slipping a hand up under his shirt, like he was in no rush. He kinda wasn’t. Could probably stay like this forever, or close to it. 

They couldn’t fuck on the couch, though, not with Robin in the other room. Steve was nothing if not a courteous housemate. So he held Billy’s legs in place and stood, bringing him up with him, almost losing his balance and laughing a little as he steadied himself.

“Not very sexy of me,” Billy just snorted, tangled his fingers up in his hair.

“Everything about you is sexy.” And he knew he was blushing, but he rolled his eyes anyway, smiled in that bashful way he did.

“Move your head, dumbass, I gotta see where I’m going.”

He carried them both into the bedroom, floundering a little as he went, kicked the door shut behind him as soon as he had the chance. Because, like,  _ yeah,  _ maybe they had some shit to talk about, but Billy’s mouth against his jaw was kinda distracting. If he didn’t wanna talk now, Steve wasn’t gonna fight him on it. 

This, he could definitely manage. 

Billy was already pulling off his shirt when Steve put him down, shimmying out of his jeans before he could even think straight. “C’mon, pretty boy, strip.” He was getting bossier in bed, Steve’d noticed, not that he  _ minded _ , he was certainly good at doing what he was told. 

He watched as Billy moved to sit at the edge of the bed, motioned for him to come over, pulled him down into a kiss, ‘on your knees, baby’ breathed against his lips. 

He got on his fucking knees. He was actually almost embarrassed how fast he did, but his dick was getting hard against his leg already, so he wasn’t about to stop and think about it. 

Billy’s fingers were in his hair, other arm propping him up on an elbow, and like, he knew where he was meant to go, didn’t need to be told.  _ God,  _ he was so hot. He’d left his underwear on, probably because he knew Steve kinda  _ liked  _ that, liked teasing him through the fabric before either of them could get that satisfaction. Billy seemed to like it too, if the noises he made were anything to go by. Steve moaned as he sucked through the boxer-briefs, smiled a little smug when he heard ‘ _ fuck _ , Stevie, such a tease,’ let Billy push him away for a second to throw his underwear off to the side somewhere. 

He was holding Steve’s head in place, grinding against his tongue, humming low in his gut. He could die like this, wouldn’t mind.  _ Fuck _ , he was so fucking hard. He brought his arms up around Billy’s thighs, practically latched on to his clit, didn’t stop until his legs were shaking in his grip, the hand holding his hair tugging him away. 

“Jesus,” Billy laughed, catching his breath. Steve lazily ran his tongue across his clit again, tried not to get too smug when he twitched a little. “God, okay,  _ god  _ you gotta stop, baby. I ain’t done with you.” So he sat back on his haunches, watched Billy close his eyes for a second, run his tongue over his lips like he needed to  _ recover  _ for a second, and if  _ that  _ didn’t inflate his ego, he wasn’t sure what would. 

Billy sat up, crawled over to the other side of the bed to open the side table drawer, where he knew Steve kept the lube. Steve made himself comfortable, climbed up onto the bed and leaned back against his elbows, watching the other, palming himself lazily just to keep it up.

He heard him snort as he pulled something Steve couldn’t see out of the drawer, couldn’t remember what it could be.

“ _ Oh _ , this’ll be  _ very  _ fun.” And oh, yeah,  _ right.  _ His fucking dildo. Billy turned back with this  _ look  _ on his face, like he was ready to devour him, it would almost be scary if it didn’t turn him  _ way  _ on. “You wanna play, pretty boy?” It was such a line, he had to breathe a laugh, ran his tongue over his lips absently.

“Uh,  _ yeah. _ ” 

Billy’s on him before he can even blink, grinning against his lips. Steve can feel the cold rubber against his side where he’s propping himself up, and  _ god,  _ he can’t imagine anything that’s as good as this is about to be. 

He likes when Billy takes control a little, not that he’s not already always in control, even when it’s Steve’s face stuffed between his legs, making him squirm. But like,  _ this  _ is hot, Billy holding his thigh, just barely teasing.

“Hands on the headboard, babe,” And it was like he could read Steve’s mind, where his hand was twitching to go next, but he did it, reached up and wrapped his hands in the slats, watched Billy intently. He shifted a little to give him a better angle, but he knew it wasn’t gonna take much of this.

“ _ Stevie,  _ you’re already so…” Billy slipped a second finger inside him, and Steve flushed red.

“Yeah, I had a little uh… time to myself earlier. That’s why it was in the drawer.” A glorious hour between when he got home from work and when Robin did, he knew when he had to seize an opportunity like that, especially since Billy hadn’t said anything in so long. 

“You think about me?” His teeth were on Steve’s neck, and he breathed a laugh-turned-moan when Billy crooked his fingers just right.

“ _ Fuck-  _ yeah, You even have to ask?” He could feel him smile against his skin.

“Think about me fuckin’ you?” He could hear that cockiness just in his voice, could feel his breath hot on his ear, could  _ definitely  _ feel a fourth finger push inside him,  _ god.  _

“Yeah, so get on with it,” He knew it would get him, get under his skin enough to spark him into action, could see it in his face. He liked a little pushback. “I’m good, c’mon.” 

“Mm, impatient,” He pulled out, and Steve didn’t want to admit to the noise he made at the absence, feeling kinda desperate for it. Billy was good at making him feel that way. He watched with wide eyes as he made a show out of slicking the thing up, made the blush creep farther down Steve’s chest, he could  _ feel _ it. 

“Bear with me, pretty boy. I got an idea,” His smile was sharp, had that glint in his eye that made Steve’s heart beat a little faster… he just nodded, adjusted his hands a little on the headboard. 

He watched as Billy swung a leg over his hips, shot him a look over his shoulder.

“Bring your legs up,” He patted Steve’s thigh, he did as he was told. 

He was in the middle of thinking about what a fucking sucker he was when he felt the head of the dildo pushing against him, relaxed a little as Billy pushed it inside, maybe smug about the little ‘ _ fuck’  _ he heard the other breathe. 

“Okay, now… maybe put your legs down a little,” Steve just let himself be pushed into whatever position, even if he still didn’t quite know where this was going. “And open a little, yeah, okay.” He sat up more on his knees and-  _ oh.  _ Okay. maybe he got it now.  _ Fuck,  _ definitely got it when Billy lowered himself onto Steve’s dick, shifted his hips a little and made a low noise. “Fuck, pretty boy. Always just as good as I remember.” Steve wanted to move, wanted to take his hands off and just… but he also didn’t dare. God, not when Billy had the reins like this, knew it would end well either way. 

It was kind of an awkward position, at first. Billy was good at multitasking, but the angle just wasn’t quite right. But then he shifted, and- “oh  _ shit,”  _ Steve almost laughed, pushed his hips down again, “Don’t move it.” Billy shot him a smile over his shoulder, looked kinda fucked, which like,  _ hot _ , that he was getting off on this just as much as Steve was. 

He started to ride him in earnest, just kept a hand on the toy so Steve could just shift down a little and- “ _ Fuck,  _ Oh fuck, Billy.” He wasn’t gonna last long,  _ shit,  _ not like this. He took his hands off the headboard, ran a hand down Billy’s back and propped himself up on an elbow, thrusting up a few times. “Turn around.” Because maybe it was sappy, but Steve liked to  _ look  _ at him, see his face. Pull him down into a kiss.  _ God.  _

They weren’t really kissing anymore, mostly just breathing into each other’s mouths, Steve doing his best to keep it up. The dildo didn’t quite come out, wedged against the bed at an angle that kept it  _ teasing  _ with every thrust, and he was fucking in  _ love.  _ What the fuck.  _ Fuck. _

Billy stuffed his face into the crook of his neck and moaned low, breath coming short against his skin, and Steve hated to think it but thank  _ god,  _ because he definitely wasn’t gonna make it much longer. “Ste- _ oh,  _ oh  _ fuck.”  _ And he could feel it, the way he tensed against him, a muffled ‘ _ baby’ _ in his ear. 

It didn’t take long after that, before Steve was running out of steam and Billy was climbing off, shifting down to swallow him down, pushing the dildo in again, pulling a frankly  _ embarrassing  _ noise out of him, and he was gone.  _ Fuck.  _ No way was he ever getting over this guy. Not when he was looking up at him all smug like that, crawling back up to kiss him, passing a cigarette back and forth before falling asleep practically on top of each other. 

Hoped he wouldn’t have to.

\---

Someone was talking.

He could feel the sunlight filtering through the windows on his eyelids, but he didn’t want to open them yet.  _ Who  _ the fuck was talking.

“Morning, I love you.” His heart stopped, he almost rolled over, kind of panicked for a second, Billy huffed behind him, and then a mumbled “No, he’d probably freak out.” He could hear him now, in the bathroom,  _ practicing?  _ Was that what he was doing? 

“How’d you sleep? I love you.” A pause, “Should I make him breakfast?” 

Holy  _ shit.  _ He didn’t dare move, but he felt like crying, a little, or laughing, or  _ something.  _ He couldn’t pretend to sleep forever, that was for sure. He settled on shifting, a little, breathing out like he was just waking up, stretching his arms above his head. 

“Hey,” He rubbed the sleep from his eyes, Billy was looking at him like he’d just seen a ghost, and Steve breathed a laugh, just to relieve the tension in his shoulders. “What?” As if he didn’t know. 

“Hi,” He sounded unsure about it, looked at Steve and then away and then back again, “I love you.” 

He knew it was coming, but that didn’t mean he didn’t like hearing it, smile widening, “Really?” Billy rolled his eyes and relaxed, like whatever string had been holding him up was cut.

“Shut up, yes really.” 

“I love you too.” It sounded good coming out of his mouth on purpose, liked the way it made Billy smile and roll his eyes again, walk back over to the bed and get in next to him. 

“It’s only cuz’ you’re hot, don’t let it get to your head.” Steve snorted, pulled Billy in to kiss him soft and lazy, still not all the way awake.

“I will,” he felt Billy smile, couldn’t help but smile himself, pulling away for a second to look at him, “I also totally heard you rehearsing.” He laughed when Billy pinched him, squirming away, “It was  _ cute,  _ don’t hurt me!” He was met with another kiss, a sigh against his lips.

“Wouldn’t dream of it, pretty boy.”


End file.
